CHECK MY STANDUP OUT ON YOUR CELLPHONES, thanks to Verizon Wireless, and the Viva! Vision Latin
Comedy Network (I'm not very Latino, and it's a Latin Comedy Network, so in order to fit in I had to get a sleeve-length tattoo of the Virgin Mary blessing a Zapatista's machine gun, get my ponytail caught in a weedwacker, and then sleep with the martini-swilling wife of the wealthy man who hired me to clean his pool because that day she felt like "soiling herself"!).

ALSO: Dan went on tour again, and this is how it was advertised:

My website has a new sponsor, Adhere to it or perish:

 

Type in your own caption for how the Cruel Master should be berating his serf!

"When you think Improvised Comedy think Christopher Guest, and when you don't think Christopher Guest, think Fred Willard, and when you don't think Fred Willard, think David Cross or Bob Odenkirk, and when you don't think of either of them, think of Jerry Minor, and if you're done thinking about Jerry Minor, and for some reason are mad right now, and don't feel like talking to Christopher Guest, Fred Willard, David Cross and Bob Odenkirk, or Jerry Minor, think Dan Dominguez." - Dan Dominguez.

 

"When you think Comedic Actors think Peter Sellers, and when you don't think Peter Sellers, think Steve Martin, and when you tire of thinking about Steve Martin because that reminds you that Bringing Down the House was real, think Bill Murray, and if you stop thinking about Bill Murray for even a moment, try to pour out some of whatever Malt Liquor you are drinking for Chris Farley, who is dead but is funny even in death, and if you at some point tire of thinking about other dead comedians while pouring out liquor, or run out of liquor to pore for them, think Dan Dominguez." - Dan Dominguez.